Anger management: 10 tips to tame your temper
Keeping
your temper in check can be challenging. Use simple anger management tips —
from taking a timeout to using "I" statements — to stay in control.
Do you find yourself fuming when
someone cuts you off in traffic? Does your blood pressure go through the roof
when your child refuses to cooperate? Anger is a normal and even healthy
emotion — but it's important to deal with it in a positive way. Uncontrolled
anger can take a toll on both your health and your relationships.
Ready to get your anger under
control? Start by considering these 10 anger management tips.
No.
1: Take a timeout
Counting to 10 isn't just for kids.
Before reacting to a tense situation, take a few moments to breathe deeply and
count to 10. Slowing down can help defuse your temper. If necessary, take a
break from the person or situation until your frustration subsides a bit.
No.
2: Once you're calm, express your anger
As soon as you're thinking clearly,
express your frustration in an assertive but nonconfrontational way. State your
concerns and needs clearly and directly, without hurting others or trying to
control them.
No.
3: Get some exercise
Physical activity can provide an
outlet for your emotions, especially if you're about to erupt. If you feel your
anger escalating, go for a brisk walk or run, or spend some time doing other
favorite physical activities. Physical activity stimulates various brain
chemicals that can leave you feeling happier and more relaxed than you were
before you worked out.
No.
4: Think before you speak
In the heat of the moment, it's easy
to say something you'll later regret. Take a few moments to collect your
thoughts before saying anything — and allow others involved in the situation to
do the same.
No.
5: Identify possible solutions
Instead of focusing on what made you
mad, work on resolving the issue at hand. Does your child's messy room drive
you crazy? Close the door. Is your partner late for dinner every night?
Schedule meals later in the evening — or agree to eat on your own a few times a
week. Remind yourself that anger won't fix anything, and might only make it
worse.
No.
6: Stick with 'I' statements
To avoid criticizing or placing
blame — which might only increase tension — use "I" statements to
describe the problem. Be respectful and specific. For example, say, "I'm
upset that you left the table without offering to help with the dishes,"
instead of, "You never do any housework."
No.
7: Don't hold a grudge
Forgiveness is a powerful tool. If
you allow anger and other negative feelings to crowd out positive feelings, you
might find yourself swallowed up by your own bitterness or sense of injustice.
But if you can forgive someone who angered you, you might both learn from the
situation. It's unrealistic to expect everyone to behave exactly as you want at
all times.
No.
8: Use humor to release tension
Lightening up can help diffuse
tension. Don't use sarcasm, though — it can hurt feelings and make things
worse.
No.
9: Practice relaxation skills
When your temper flares, put
relaxation skills to work. Practice deep-breathing exercises, imagine a
relaxing scene, or repeat a calming word or phrase, such as, "Take it
easy." You might also listen to music, write in a journal or do a few yoga
poses — whatever it takes to encourage relaxation.
No.
10: Know when to seek help
Learning to control anger is a
challenge for everyone at times. Consider seeking help for anger issues if your
anger seems out of control, causes you to do things you regret or hurts those
around you. You might explore local anger management classes or anger
management counseling. With professional help, you can:
- Learn what anger is
- Identify what triggers your anger
- Recognize signs that you're becoming angry
- Learn to respond to frustration and anger in a controlled, healthy way
No comments:
Post a Comment